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Rant: To Boldly Wait




<A bit later, Barry arrives at Rod’s tent.>

Barry: I should have known.

Rod: Hey, I’m just trying to make sure I get in the first show.

Barry: But over a week before it opens? I know it’s the big movie for the summer, but aren’t you going too far?

<Rod and Barry hear ‘SNIKT’ from behind them. They turn around to find a college-age guy in a Wolverine costume, complete with claws.>

Wolverine Fan: What do you mean by that remark?

Barry: Excuse me?

Wolverine Fan: What do you mean that Star Trek is the big movie for the summer. The big movie is X-Men Origins: Wolverine and not Star Trek.

Barry: I must disagree. Star Trek is the most anticipated movie, and has a long history.

Wolverine Fan: Yeah a long history of the same old thing: space travel. Our movie is set on Earth where it should be.

Barry: Why do you object to space travel? May I remind you that men are working even now on returning to your moon and then to Mars?

Wolverine Fan: That’s different as that is the real world. There are more topics for movies than Enterprise flies to a planet, Kirk gets the girl, the bad guy is dealt with, and all is right in the universe.

Rod: Sir, you must not have watched any TV in some time. This is a new Star Trek, with new actors and a new director.

Wolverine Fan: New director, new actors, same old story. Now, with Wolverine, it’s different. This time the story centers on him, tells how he became what he is, and how his past life shaped him into what he is today. He is a true hero that doesn’t need pointy ears and green makeup to be a hero.

Rod: So, it takes a guy with metal claws and a bad haircut to make a hero? Please!!

Wolverine Fan: What, you got something against claws?

<Wolverine Fan pops his claws again, showing them to Rod and Barry.>

Rod: Uh….nice craftsmanship. Did you make those yourself?

Wolverine Fan: Why, yes, thanks. I spent three months…but I digress. You were saying?

Barry: And Star Trek is not the same old story. In many ways, it’s the same premise as your film. This film show the crew of the Enterprise first getting together and at Starfleet Academy. That’s never been done before.

Wolverine Fan: Well…….

Rod: The crew of the Enterprise doesn’t require special powers, or a surgical makeover. They boldly go as they are.

Barry: And Star Trek has been going for over 40 years in TV and/or movies which makes it the longest running franchise.

Rod: The only movies that have more are the James Bond movies, and he always gets the babes too!

Barry: And Star Trek gives man hope that one day he’ll go to the stars. That makes it unique.

<Wolverine Fan retracts his claws.>

Wolverine Fan: I can’t argue with that. Nice talking to you.

Barry: Now, are you going to come home and wait till closer to the movie?

Rod: No. I was talking to another person who said they’d come back to talk further.

Barry: Who was it?

<Barry feels a tap on his shoulder and hears a voice that very strangely sounds like the Governor of California, saying:>

Voice From Behind: I’m back.

<The boys turn around and face the newcomer.>

Barry: <doing his best Scott Bakula voice> Oh, boy.

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