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Rants: Tractor Beam

Rod: You know, this is an interesting flavor. Kinda fruity, but there’s something else I can’t identify.

Barry: That would be dirt. I can’t believe you took that off the floor and put it in your mouth. Aren’t you worried about germs and stuff?

Rod: Nah. It’s all part of learning about the Earth.

Barry: Research? Eewww!!

Rod: Speaking of research…

<<Rod leaves his seat, and comes back after a few minutes loaded down with hot dogs, popcorn, candy, and drinks.>>

Barry: Rod, what is all that?

Rod: Well, I figure if the humans are all eating this stuff, there must be some reason.

Barry: We’ve had popcorn before. We know what it tastes like. And, we consumed our nutrition packs before we came, so we don’t need the hot dogs. I’ll take the drink, though. What kind of candy did you get?

Rod: Something called “Raisinets”. The girl at the counter said it was the most popular candy they have.

Barry: You don’t even know what it is?

Rod: Well, I said this was research. I wanted to experience what most of the humans do.

<<Barry opens his box of Raisinets and pours a few into his hand.>>

Barry: Eewww!! These things look like…

Rod: Gurlggrs! I used to love those when I was a kid!

Barry: I could never bring myself to eat them. They look like…

<<Rod takes the Raisinets from Barry’s hand and puts them in his mouth, chews for a few seconds, and spits them onto the floor.>>

Rod: These definitely are not Gurlggrs. They taste like…

Barry: Enough! You’re making me sick.

Rod: So, do you want your hot dog and popcorn?

Barry: No, just the drink.

Rod: Cool! I love this stuff. I even got extra butter.

Barry: Remember what happened the last time you ate too much popcorn?

Rod: Yea, but this is REAL theater popcorn, not that junk from the grocery. This is important research.

<<After the movie is over…>>

Barry: Boy, that movie was great! And the scenes where young Spock was taking old Spock’s ship towards Nero’s ship? All that fancy flying, back and forth, dodging stuff, and up and down…what’s wrong, Rod? You don’t look so good…

<Rod moans and runs to the bathroom. Barry goes in after him, and he hears strange noises from Rod’s stall. After a few minutes, Rod emerges and Barry looks in the stall.

Rod: Note to self…no more food research for me.

Barry: Eewww!!

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Rod & Barry Plush Set