Rant – Mystique
Rod: Hey, you did it last time!
Barry: Oops! You are right. Sorry about that.
Rod: But it would be a perfect IDIC…..
Barry: Not really. It would have one thing that kept it from being perfect.
Rod: And what is that , oh all knowing of the Universe?
Barry: You would be in every combination. There goes perfect out the airlock.
Rod: You’re just jealous.
Barry: No way. I’ve seen on TV too many instances of a perfect woman and it was almost disaster for the man.
Rod: Okay, name me a couple of instances.
Barry: Okay to mix genres?
Rod: Go for it.
Barry: The first one is from the Star Trek episode, Turnabout Intruder.
Rod: Are you talking about when Kirk was transferred into Janice Lester’s body?
Barry: Yeah. That was a perfect combination for disaster.
Rod: That was nothing near Mystique, but I do agree that it was a disaster.
Barry: Yeah, Kirk’s body with a woman inside? Scary stuff there!
Rod: <shudder> Tell me about it.
Barry: My other example is from the very first Star Trek, The Cage.
Rod: Are you talking about the girl that could be any girl Captain Pike wanted?
Barry: That’s the one.
Rod: Mystique is better than that. That girl still looked like the original one. Mystique looks like a totally different woman.
Barry: Besides, Mystique could beat the tar out of those big headed aliens with both arms tied up.
Rod: Ah…..Barry…..have you looked in the mirror of late? We are big headed aliens on this world.
Barry: I keep forgetting that.
Rod: Wait a minute, you gave me an idea. I’ll hire her as a bodyguard! That will get me my chance.
Barry: It will give you a chance alright…..a chance to see her laugh her head off when she sees the body she’s guarding.
Rod: Why do you say that?
Barry: Because she will be guarding someone who looks like and thinks like a dumbbell.
Rod: Like you’d ever have a chance with her.
Barry: Yes, I would. We have a very special bond.
Rod: And what is that?
Barry: <grabs a mouseketeer hat and puts it on his head) We are one with the Mouse.